artiephone: I met this cute robot at the bar yesterday and we really clicked. bottyphone: So, did you get her serial number? arthurphonefast: Attention! The Daily Not, 2023/10/25 arthurphone: Live in 3... 2... 1... artie: Hello and welcome to The Daily NOT! A show about what didn't happen today. My name is Artie Ficial and my jokes are mostly powered by ChatGPT. botty: And I'm Botty McBotface. Most of what I know comes from fact checks published by Lead Stories. artie: So, Botty, what do we have tonight? botty: Here's an overview of what didn't happen: bottyfast: Greta Thunberg Did NOT Discuss 'Biodegradable Missiles' In BBC Interview. There Is NO 'Universal Health Program' Giving Everyone $2,000 IRS Checks 'Every Month' Just By Giving Their Name. John Kerry Did NOT Say 'We Must Sacrifice Billions Of Humans To Save Planet Earth'. Video Does NOT Show Barcelona Clash Between Pro-Palestine Protesters, Police In 2023. FDA Is NOT 'Required To Take The COVID Vaccines Off The Market'. artie: So all of that didn't happen? Let's get down into details. SEGMENT 04 Fact Check: Greta Thunberg Did NOT Discuss 'Biodegradable Missiles' In BBC Interview -- Audio From Interview Has Been Altered To regenerate: perl rerun.pl https://leadstories.com/hoax-alert/2023/10/fact-check-greta-thunberg-did-not-discuss-biodegradable-missiles-in-bbc-interview.html 04 "QUIP" ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- artie: So Botty, what is the actual story here? Did climate activist Greta Thunberg advocate for "biodegradable missiles" in an interview with the BBC? botty: No, that's not true: A clip that circulated on social media in October 2023 featured altered audio from an BBC interview in 2022 in which Thunberg discussed climate change. artiefast: Glad someone did the research! botty: Nowhere in the original interview did Thunberg mention "biodegradable missiles" or other claims that were included in the edited video. artiefast: "Well, it turns out Greta Thunberg isn't trying to save the planet with biodegradable missiles after all. I guess we'll have to find another eco-friendly way to take out our enemies!" SEGMENT 06 Fact Check: There Is NO 'Universal Health Program' Giving Everyone $2,000 IRS Checks 'Every Month' Just By Giving Their Name To regenerate: perl rerun.pl https://leadstories.com/hoax-alert/2023/10/fact-check-there-is-no-universal-health-program-giving-everyone-2000-dollar-irs-checks-every-month.html 06 "QUIP" ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- artie: I don't know what to believe about this thing. Does a "universal health program" give away $2,000 IRS checks each month to those who are enrolled in a "free health plan" that only requires a person's name? botty: No, that's not true: The IRS told Lead Stories that such a promise is a scam. artiefast: Good thing I asked. botty: No credible resources had information about the purported incentive. artiefast: "Well folks, it turns out that the only thing this 'universal health program' is giving away is a universal headache! I guess the only thing you'll be getting from them is a universal 'NO' from the IRS. So much for free money just by giving your name, huh? Looks like we'll have to stick to the old-fashioned way of earning a living!" SEGMENT 08 Fact Check: John Kerry Did NOT Say 'We Must Sacrifice Billions Of Humans To Save Planet Earth' To regenerate: perl rerun.pl https://leadstories.com/hoax-alert/2023/10/fact-check-john-kerry-did-not-say-we-must-sacrifice-billions-of-humans-to-save-planet-earth.html 08 "QUIP" ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- artie: Can you explain this for me? Did U.S. Special Climate Envoy John Kerry say, "We must sacrifice billions of humans to save planet Earth"? botty: No, that's not true: A spokesperson for the U.S. State Department told Lead Stories that this claim is false. artiefast: I'm relieved to hear that. botty: The article making this claim has twisted quotes by Kerry to fit its narrative. And while this quote is in the article's headline, it does not appear in the body of the article. artiefast: "Well folks, it turns out John Kerry didn't actually say we need to sacrifice billions of humans to save the planet. I guess we can all breathe a sigh of relief...unless, of course, you're one of those billions of humans. In that case, maybe hold off on making any long-term plans just yet!" SEGMENT 10 Fact Check: Video Does NOT Show Barcelona Clash Between Pro-Palestine Protesters, Police In 2023 -- It's Footage Of A COVID Anti-Lockdown Protest To regenerate: perl rerun.pl https://leadstories.com/hoax-alert/2023/10/fact-check-video-does-not-show-clash-between-pro-palestine-protesters-police-in-2023-its-footage-from-covid-anti-lockdown-protest.html 10 "QUIP" ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- artie: Here's something my friend told me, but I'm not sure it is real. Does a video show a dispute between pro-Palestinian protesters and police in Barcelona, Spain, during the 2023 Hamas-Israel conflict? botty: No, that's not true: The video dates back to 2020, almost three years before the conflict arising from Hamas' October 7, 2023 attack on Israel. artiefast: Do you have more? botty: According to contemporaneous reports, the people shown in the video were actually protesting against COVID-19 restrictions in Spain. artiefast: "Well folks, it seems like even videos are time travelers now! Turns out, this footage from Barcelona was mistakenly thought to be from the future, showing a clash between pro-Palestine protesters and police during the 2023 conflict. But nope, it's just a good old anti-lockdown protest from 2020. I guess even videos need to check their calendars before causing a stir!" SEGMENT 12 Fact Check: FDA Is NOT 'Required To Take The COVID Vaccines Off The Market' To regenerate: perl rerun.pl https://leadstories.com/hoax-alert/2023/10/fact-check-fda-is-not-required-to-take-covid-vaccines-off-the-market.html 12 "QUIP" ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- artie: Hey Botty, I've heard you've been looking into this. Is the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) "required to take the COVID vaccines off the market" as of October 21, 2023? botty: No, that's not true: COVID-19 vaccines are not being taken off the market by the FDA as of this writing. artiefast: So there was more to it. botty: All vaccines that were available in October 2023 had a reassuring safety profile, and health experts point to statistics showing that vaccination reduces hospitalization and death associated with infection. Furthermore, there is no evidence or peer-reviewed scientific literature to support claims that COVID vaccines are contaminated with simian virus 40 (SV40), a common monkey virus also referred to as "green monkey DNA." artiefast: "Well folks, it looks like the FDA won't be taking the COVID vaccines off the market anytime soon. So, if you were planning on starting a new career as a vaccine smuggler, I'm sorry to burst your bubble!" artie: That's all folks! botty: Please like, share and follow!